Feel completely normal except for my hearing. Trying to be patient but it's not changing at the moment.
When I lie on my op-ear it goes blocked/muffled although I can still hear low frequencies loud. When I play from the bottom of the piano to the top it gets more distorted the higher I go. Can't bear to hear whistling. The actual decibel level is sometimes good, but it's not quality sound, and I feel distressed about that. I suppose if I had been profoundly deaf before the op I wouldn't care so much.
I can't play the piano at the moment anyway because I have an RSI related thumb complaint (yawn) so I have to wear a contraption that immobilises my thumb, day and night, for 3 weeks. It's bloody inconvenient when changing nappies, washing up, doing up buttons, doing up my bra, putting on shoes, picking things up such as drinks..etc etc. I'm allowed to take it off to shower (but then I have to put the cotton wool and vaseline and cling film on my ear - argh!).
Bloody stupid. Feel like a hypochondriac but I am not!
In other news we got the survey results back from the house we are (supposed to be) buying. People had warned us, as first time buyers, not to sh!t ourselves too much when we saw it, but I certainly failed at that. Was close to tears yesterday as we researched such f*ck ups as foam roof lining, what to do about it, and the costs.
Two nights ago I slept through the night for 8 hours. I haven't slept through the night since April, so this was pretty big news. Last night sadly was completely back to normal: struggled to get to sleep, then woken by C at 12.45am, struggled to get back to sleep again, then woken again at 3am, 5am then awake for the day at 6am. G also woke a fair bit but Adriano saw to her, thank goodness. Think I need some sleeping tablets but I am scared of the idea of them and also then I wouldn't be able to have C in my bed which sometimes is the only thing that works. I am not leaving them to cry. They share a room and it would just be ridiculous and completely opposite to what I would do if they were upset in the day. When they are older I will say 'your sister's there with you, go to sleep' but for now there's a 1 year old who occasionally sleeps through but most often not, plus a 3 year old with a very vivid imagination. People whose children sleep from 7pm to 7am have NO idea how lucky they are and those who have 'children who sleep plus children who don't sleep' realise that sometimes the only thing to do is to accept that your children are not good sleepers and get on with it.
It was my birthday on Friday. Adriano took us all to Wagamama's for lunch which was truly lovely. Sadly we all have/had colds and felt like cr@p so we didn't do the early evening trip to the Enchanted Woodland with fairy lights etc. So gutted we missed it as I keep bumping into my friends who went and said it was brilliant. Next year we won't be here then.
Can you tell I'm feeling a bit sad?
Good things are still alive and well in my life though. I have a caring loving husband and two amazing funny bright loving girls who I will never ever stop being grateful for.
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