Tuesday, 10 November 2009

what's occuring

Little G is now into turning book pages.

She gets very very upset when you take the baby wipes away from her and if left to her own devices will pull all of them out of the packet faster than you can say 'pooey bottom'. Today she spent a solid twenty minutes exploring the sticker that covers up the opening hole.

Her teeth have not yet made an appearance and she still can't crawl forwards but she does a mean 'downward-facing dog' yoga pose.

I think I am pre-menstrual again. Thrillsville.

Adriano and I keep arguing because I ask him to pick up after himself.

I know he is jealous of me being able to look after G most of the time. I feel for him. For my part I am exhausted from looking after her and keeping the house running. I would rather be in my role than his, and I am very grateful to him for working so hard for us. Also, I am very tired.

Our house is very cold.

I have work tomorrow and the next day. I am not managing to feel any joy about that whatsoever.

G has had one of those days where she doesn't smile or laugh as much as usual and when that happens I always think she doesn't love me anymore. Psycho mum!

I keep unsubscribing from various emails and they don't seem to take any notice.

I liked being outside today even though it was cold and rainy and the piles of leaves have largely turned to sludge. I got my gloves out for the first time this year.

I have been doing a bit of baby-signing with G. She hasn't signed back yet but I'm hoping she will at some point. I've been doing 'finished', 'bird', 'plane', 'food', 'milk', 'home', 'bubbles' and 'drink'. Can't think of any others right now.

G made friends with about ten old ladies today in a cafe. A couple of them thought she was a boy even though she was wearing tights, a skirt, and a pink jumper. *sigh* It'll be good when her hair grows a bit more although she's got more than a lot of babies her age.

This morning I found out that a friend of mine is pregnant with her 2nd baby. Also this morning there was a 6-week old baby at the playgroup I took G to. Both things made me feel broody even though I'm tired (did I mention that already?) and I don't want to feel sick til week 16 again.

I heard this last week that a teacher I used to work with was recently killed in a car accident. That gave me a lot to think about. The friend who told me about it has worked in the room next door to him for 10 years. Today my friend had to clear out his room. She says she feels lost.

Today is my father-in-law's birthday; his first without his wife. He is keeping himself madly busy, presumably to fend off the inevitable wall of grief. When it hits him we'll be there, but in the meantime it can be a little hard to watch. Adriano and his family are all experiencing that dreaded list of 'firsts' that come after a loved one's death. Christmas will no doubt be very poignant; thankfully we have G to help us through. I suspect she'll go mad for the present wrappings and make us all smile and laugh.


Sarah said...

That last photo is so nice. It's good to see a post from you. :-)

Cheerful One said...


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* proud new mother * last child * youngest daughter * tallest sister * favourite auntie * honest lover * furtive photographer * diary writer * compulsive dancer * tree hugger * mooncup promoter * chocolate taster * house plant murderer *